Just went thru a mini victory: beating a serious craving for a very calorific exotic meal.I realize that I missed this feeling of being in control and saying a gentle no to myself, for the benefit of my long term goal. I know it takes one small no, one small step at a time, overtime...
Now on to tackling this bit of fear & shame I carry about having let myself gain back sooo much weight and having to walk back into the gym I was once a daily fixture at...my former fellow regulars will discover just what I have been up to all this time...there'll be stares & whispers maybe, then again maybe not, after all everyone has their own sh*t to deal with. It's all in my mind. I need to stay focused on myself and what I am trying to accomplish and not worry about others. Just do it. Period.
K.
2 months ago
3 comments:
Congrats on the mini victory. You're right about the gym, too. No one can really tell what anyone's thinking about you -- even if they're thinking about you at all. I like to think that maybe some of them were overweight once, and that they're silently cheering me on. I'm definitely cheering you on! All the best, Anna.
It's great that you celebrate the small victories. All the small ones will come together to form one big victory in the end.
I totally know what you mean about the gym. I still worry a bit about what others think (still being the fat guy at the gym). But I figure hey, at least they know I am there 5 days a week and am doing something about it now.
Take care and great blog you have here. :)
Thanks so much for these comments guys! Means a lot to have you cheering me on! I did it! went to the gym, and had a decent workout. Two fellow gym goers from my former life were there and were so happy to welcome me back. I was candid about having to start over and they said well at least you know how to do it! It feels sooooooooo good being back in there, I wish I could bottle up this feeling for the hard days that are sure to come. thanks again guys. K.
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