Tuesday, July 26, 2011
Woman, Food and God
Sunday, July 24, 2011
Inspiration
Tomorrow's Successes
Don't be afraid of high hopes
or plans that seem to be out of reach.
Life is meant to be experienced,
and every situation allows for
Motivation is a positive starting point,
and action places you on a forward path.
A dream is a blueprint
of a goal not yet achieved;
the only difference between the two
is the effort involved in attaining
what you hope to accomplish.
Let your mind and heart urge you on;
allow the power of your will
to lead you to your destination.
Don't count the steps ahead;
just add up the total
of steps already covered,
and multiply it by
faith, confidence, and endurance.
Always remember that
for those who persist,
today's dreams are transformed
into tomorrow's successes.
~ Kelly D. Caron ~
Friday, July 22, 2011
Yes!
"You have to decide what your highest priorities are and have the courage—pleasantly, smilingly, nonapologetically—to say no to other things. And the way to do that is by having a bigger yes burning inside." Stephen Covey
Monday, June 27, 2011
Your Future, Your Choice
FROM JILLIAN
Never forget this: The only thing standing between the old you and the new you is a choice. Once you make that choice — and start being true to yourself — it has a ripple effect on your entire future. There are so many people out there who are giving up, accepting what they believe to be their fate, and literally lying down to die. Don't be that person! We only have one life on this earth, so it's time to take control and live the life you were meant to live! Each step you take, whether it's dumping the processed junk in your kitchen to taking the time to honor yourself, is a positive change toward a healthy future. Keep it up and you just might inspire the future of those around you!
Sunday, June 26, 2011
“The Truth”
no matter how beautiful it is:
I believe in my power
to transform indifference into love.
I believe I have an amazing gift
to keep hope alive in the face of despair.
I believe I have the remarkable skill
of deleting bitterness from my life.
I believe in my budding potential
to live with a nonviolent heart.
I believe in my passion to speak the truth
even when it isn’t popular.
I believe I have the strength of will
to be peace in a world of violence.
I believe in my miraculous capacity
for unconditional love.
I will believe the truth about myself
no matter how beautiful it is.”
~Macrina Wiederkehr
from “Seven Sacred Pauses, Living Mindfully Through the Hours of the Day”
Tuesday, June 21, 2011
Inspiring & timely words
Tuesday, October 19, 2010
Perfect House
Thursday, October 14, 2010
Good day
Tuesday, October 12, 2010
That Liar!
1. I survived day one of detox and conditioning for the road ahead, despite hunger pangs and a spliting headache. that told me I have to plan my meals better, the goal being to nourish myself well, not deprive my body. So I packed a fuller, yet very healthy lunch and snacks for today.
2. I still did not manage to sleep by 10. I was in bed by then but was engrossed in a mystery movie that only ended at 11:15, so that is when I fell asleep. Got to get a better handle on that sleeping time.
3. Woke up relatively on time, after 8+ hours of sleep, and faced the scale. I weigh everyday because it helps me understand my body better. It's made me recognize then I ovulate (sorry male readers), when I've had too much sodium, when I am retaining water cause of white rice ingestion, etc. So I weighed again today hoping to see a drop in weight due to water retention, etc. And much to my suprise, that liar of a scale showed me a 6.2 lbs increase in weight! Can believe it? so clearly I wasn't 299.4 lbs yesterday, the darn thing tricked me-either that-or the universe was trying to help a sister out by not letting her see that she was over 300 lbs on day one! Either way I am still way beyond the 320 lbs I thought I'd see yesterday, and it is fine. Really.
4. got my workout in. I ran into my former trainer and other familiar faces at the gym. No biggie. Got the job done at a slightly faster pace than yesterday at that, and then bounced out of there!
5. Having a splendid day so far, though a bit sore from 2 days of exercising a 300+ body, but I like it. I am taking steps in the right direction, and I will not stop.
Kave a wonderful day everyone.
K.
Monday, October 11, 2010
Day 1-Detox and conditioning
Off to the gym I went on that high note. There were only about 4-5 people in there, unfamiliar faces. I was immediately at ease. Hoped on my tready and walked comfortably for 20 minutes, at a slow/regular pace of 2.5 mph. Right now my goal is just to get back into the habit of daily exercise, not trying to meet a particular pace, burn a number of calories or any of that sort of thing. It'll be 20 mins a day, however I can handle, for the rest of this week.
As I was working out, 2 other workout freaks from my former incarnation walked in and greeted me warmly, they were thrilled to see me back, and I was candid about having to start all over again. They were supportive, non judgemental, and one of them said the best thing: You know how to do this! And I sure do. It is amazing how just having decided to take back the reign of my life and health positively affects my whole outlook and attitude already. I feel so wonderful. I wish I could bottle up this feeling for use on those hard days that are sure to come! But I also know how to handle those!.
K.
Sunday, October 10, 2010
Phewwwww
Now on to tackling this bit of fear & shame I carry about having let myself gain back sooo much weight and having to walk back into the gym I was once a daily fixture at...my former fellow regulars will discover just what I have been up to all this time...there'll be stares & whispers maybe, then again maybe not, after all everyone has their own sh*t to deal with. It's all in my mind. I need to stay focused on myself and what I am trying to accomplish and not worry about others. Just do it. Period.
K.
I am finally beginning to sense it again...
K.
Thursday, October 7, 2010
I am an emotional eater
I am struggling to come out and find a new normal. It seems like something in me has just gone unconscious and won't fully awaken to my new reality and to the fact that I am eating myself to misery. Where and how do I begin healing? How do I reconnect with myself? How do I put myself first and care for me? How do I get to the decision to commit to myself and to weight loss? I am struggling
Sunday, October 3, 2010
I am losing my mind
Thursday, August 5, 2010
20 months
Thursday, July 29, 2010
The good & the reality
The reality: I am seated in all sorts of distorted ways cause I DO NOT FIT in my seat. It is what it is & That is all for tonight. Back to my movie. Angelina Jolie is kicking ass in it! Love it!
Monday, July 19, 2010
Women Food and God
Ending the War: Food as a doorway to your Self
I’ve just finished moderating a 6-week web retreat with Geneen Roth, author of Women Food and God. I accepted Geneen’s invitation because I loved her book, respect her as a teacher, and wanted to learn more about food as a doorway to a deeper relationship with myself. I’m so glad I did. The course was eye opening, mind shifting, and provocative in all the right ways. Here are just a few of the lessons I learned from the experience. I hope they speak to you.
What my mind and my mouth tell me to eat is rarely what my body wants.
What my mind tells me to do in relationship to exercise is rarely how my body wants to move.
My head and heart often make my food and exercise choices, not my body.
How I eat is how I live. If I’m rushed, overwhelmed, or irritated, for instance, I eat on the run, shovel food in my mouth to get meals over with, or make food choices designed to numb my frazzled nerves. These behaviors do not support weight loss or a vibrant and healthy body.
Deprivation, restrictions, and rigid rules will always lead right back to poor food choices, rebellious overeating, and a “what the hell” attitude. It’s requires a paradigm shift to get that we change with love, not with demands.
Diets teach us to rely on something outside of ourselves – a program, a set of guidelines, or the numbers on a scale. This approach is the opposite of what we need to maintain a healthy lifestyle. It all starts on the inside, by listening to your body and your highest Self.
Ending the war with food is about beginning a relationship with myself based on trust. Staying awake and listening to my body so I eat when I’m hungry, eat what my body wants, and stop when I’m full, is the path to creating a more loving and trusting relationship with myself.
When we learn to trust ourselves with food, an even bigger world opens up to us.
If you’re interested in calling a truce when it comes to your war with food and weight loss, I suggest you sit with each of the seven lessons above. Then, if you’d like to go deeper, you might want to get the archive package of Geneen’s course (you can find it here). Please know that her program is not a quick fix. As Geneen said during the last session: “This path isn’t about losing weight quickly, it’s about connecting with who you really are – the part of you that doesn’t weigh a pound.” Love that…
Take Action Challenge
This week, contemplate this piece of wisdom from Geneen:
“How you eat is how you live.”
How is your relationship with food a mirror for your life?
I found this week’s video on a Twitter post from Tony Robbins. It’s adorable and the message is important ☺. You can find it here.
Tuesday, May 25, 2010
Still I rise
Thanks for your continued support.
K.
Monday, April 26, 2010
All's well!
Thursday, April 22, 2010
Well it is my birthday! It's my birthdaaaaaayyyy!!!!!
On this day I came to be, my thoughts are never far from the woman who made it all possible: my mum. I miss her so much today. It's just not the same without her. I realize 33 years ago this was the happiest day of her life.
This is indeed the day that inextricaly brought us together, and she always rushed to wish me a happy one before everyone else. I thank God for all of her.
I have a full day ahead of me, and I've decided to relax about my diet a bit today in celebration of me. I won't go crazy or anything, but will let loose a bit, hoping the scale will be understanding? yes? ;-(. Lol. Then it is right back on track tomorrow. HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!!!!
K.
Monday, April 19, 2010
I miss my mum
K.
Sunday, April 18, 2010
Hectic!!!
K.
Update on the guy
K.
Wednesday, April 14, 2010
Good morning to my health
I'll see how I can slowly move towards that cause I do not want to overwhelm myself with too many changes at once. Gotta pace myself and ease back into it. One change at a time...
I am going to turn in, signing off with a reminder of why early morning exercise is sooo good! K.
Benefits of working out in the morning
. Morning Exercisers Stick With It
Studies have shown that people who exercise in the morning, or being a morning exercise routine, are more likely to still be exercising one year later, when compared to those who exercise at other times of the day.
2. Morning Exercisers Have More Energy
Although you may have to drag yourself out of bed in the morning, the energy you create by exercising in the morning will sustain you through the day. You will have more energy to go to work, take care of the kids, or do whatever it is you do all day.
You also have more energy to exercise in the morning, than after a long day of work or childcare.
3. Morning Exercisers Sleep Better
Exercising in the morning will help you sleep better at night. By getting up earlier, you will go to sleep earlier, hopefully finding your natural sleep cycle. Working out in the evening hours can create an adrenalin rush that may be hard to come down from and get some sleep.
4. Morning Exercisers Eat Better
A psychological and nutritional benefit that comes with morning exercise is a day of eating better. When wake up early to exercise, and spend an hour or more actually exercising before doing anything else, you willapproach eating with a different mentality than if you exercise in the evening.
It is easier to avoid temptation and talk yourself out of eating unhealthily when you spend your waking hours sweating away the pounds. The fact that you got up and did something healthy andpositive for you body will keep you from indulging or making the wrong food choices.
5. Morning Exercisers Are in a Better Mood
Another added benefit of a morning work out is enjoying the positive mood you have created. You will be proud of yourself for getting up an exercising. You will feel clear and calm by exercising in the morning.
Tuesday, April 13, 2010
Stressed out today!
I must say that I love this project she left me to finish, it is a wonderful gift I'll talk about more in depth in a future post. I simply wish I didn't have the constraint of having to report to work, that way I could devote all my time to it.
Anyway as far as my day went, said project took me all day, which I hadn't planned. So I was caught without lunch-but I adjusted to the circumstances and didn't give in to the temptation of grabbing a sandwich or any other type of fast food though I considered it for a hot minute. Then I reminded myself that this moment is precisely when you need to deny yourself and chose the healthy option. So I went looking for and found a place that serves grilled steak and salads, which is what I ended up having. I am glad I stayed on track and put my goal first in that moment. I had to however give myself a rest day from exercise because it would have been complicated to fit in...thought in hindsight I see where I could have worked it in...At the time though,I think I did the best I could, simply deciding that too many unplanned activities had surfaced, and that I could simply give myself a rest day instead of beating myself up over not being able to workout...I live and learn, things won't always be perfect on this journey, but I can always do the best I can with the circumstances I am dealt with.
K.
Monday, April 12, 2010
Sore, but good day
K.
Sunday, April 11, 2010
A peek at my doubting, fear filled reality
I am actually faced with a dilemma that sadly reflects my current reality. A friend of mine introduced me to this great looking, friendly guy about 2 months ago. We've been e-mailing and talking to each other and he sounds like a nice, cool guy. He's been calling repeatedly for 3 days cause he wants us to physically meet...logical next step, after all we currently live in the same city, 15 mins away from each other and I am 32, very single, very much looking forward to meeting a nice guy, and this guy sounds like a good one. So why do I make him call for 3 days without actually meeting him? Well for the same reason I did this with another guy, another very promising bachelor, at the beginning of this year. Because, I feel like I do not stand a snow ball's chance in hell of these guys taking a look at me and still wanting to date me. I believe ! am just too morbidly obese at this point in time to even think these type of guys will want me, let alone dare to actually go meet them like there is a chance, pffff. What would be the point except to be faced with confirmation that I am unattractive and be rejected? It's not like these guys can fall for me with the way I look? It is not going to happen and it is a sad state of affairs, because I do want companionship and I know I am a great looking girl underneath these layers of fat and I have so much to offer... but I've convinced myself that no one can possibly want all 300 lb. of me right now and that very belief is stopping me from stepping out and giving anyone the benefit of the doubt. I've already defeated myself in my own mind and I can't bring myself to get past this barrier. I fully realize that I might be missing out on opportunities of a lifetime, and that I am letting opportunities and bits of my life slip by, but I just can't muster up the strength and courage to take such a bold chance. So now my question is, do I honor how I feel and truthfully tell him what I am grappling with? Do I open up and trust him with this intimate detail about my life or do I start ignoring his calls until he believes I've disappeared off the face of the earth?
K.
Staying encouraged
I love this quote, as do many people and I believe it's key operative word is COURAGE. Courage is what beginning a weight loss, or any other healing journey, is about for me. The key challenge is to be and stay encouraged at the beginning. Case in point: at present I am faced with the daunting goal of losing 125 lb., which I know first hand will require complete dedication on my part for at least a year and a half so... lots of focus, sacrifice, discipline, consistency and belief are in store for me. How does one stay encouraged when catching a single glimpse of yourself provides you with visual confirmation of just how far gone you are and just how much work lies ahead? How do you stay mentally strong, emotionally steady, spiritually sound over a long enough period of time to start making a dent into that huge a goal? That's been the true challenge for me, especially at the onset of my weight loss journeys. However, life is so well ordained that this time around, I can benefit from my recent experience of losing my mother, as well as previous successful weight loss journey which give me valuable insight into what is required. Because I've been down and somehow managed to talk and act myself out of despair; because I've been able to come out of that and somewhat recover, I know that one has to be able to pace herself and solely focus on one day and one moment at a time. The goal is to wake up everyday and decide to keep healing for that day and then pose one small healing action after the other, take one good decision after the other, 'til one reaches a critical mass of time after which other mundane and external things can take over as motivator, like better physical shape, fitting into better looking clothes, stamina and just feeling better about yourself, your life and the space you occupy in this world. I am glad I have been here before, and gone through various degrees of pain and recovery because I now know without the shadow of a doubt that I can feel bad and recover and that it starts with a decision to keep encouraging myself, one moment, one hour, one day at a time.
K.
Saturday, April 10, 2010
What I tell myself is so important!
I read this sentence yesterday on one of the wonderful weight loss blogs out there, and it rang so very true to me. Having been through this journey before, I know for a fact that weight loss is a lot about negotiating, prodding, encouraging, convincing yourself to make daily choices that support and lead to your desired result. It's about changing your internal dialogue, to repeatedly tell yourself that you are indeed worth the better, healthier choice. That you can in fact take that walk even tough you've had a rough day, that you can resist temptations that come your way, that you deserve every bit of effort and that will indeed be successful in the end. It is no small task as it requires a virtual rewiring of mental patterns and serious change of habits. But it is such a worthy one, because over time, you start believing in your new internal discourse and in yourself. You become more reliable and faithful to yourself. You grow stronger, you have a better hold of yourself and you become your own best friend, ready and able to face anything that comes your way. I should know, I was there 18 months ago and I can't wait to get back!
K.